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I chose and I didn't really want either choice. I am 34, I am a full time student, I will have a Doctorate in a few years, but it was so hard, so hard. It was last week and it felt terrible to me.

All the hormones and the thoughts and mini-dreams I had just disappeared. I am deeply grieving. I made this choice because my boyfriend really is not ready for this now, too many complications in our lives (including the fact that this happened to both of us once before, two children already that were unplanned). How silly it seems... we are not that young and we should have done better, but we didn't. I wish in some ways that I had the courage to run from the doctor's office... but I didn't.

I am so sad, but I wanted to offer some outreach and comfort to my sisters going through this same sadness: hope lifts our hearts and time heals them.

I have done a few things to help myself grieve and recover. I have prayed a lot, and made a small altar for the not-quite here one, I have lit incense and "spoken" to the spirit, and I have sought support from those closest to me. We can be amazingly strong.