Its been about 11 months since I made my decision to get the abortion. Being only 18 at the time and a freshman in college, I wondered how could this happen to me. I'm a smart girl, but I made some stupid decisions and now I have to face the consequences. I only took one pregnancy test and about two days after I made my appointment. I figured if they took the test and I wasn't pregnant, then of course I would have nothing to worry about. However, a couple days before, I had the worse type of virus there was. I was stuck in bed, throwing up, and the entire time my boyfriend was there.
Going to Planned Parenthood I felt scared, nervous, and very unsure. But I knew that this HAD to be the right decision...right? I went back with the counselors, signed the documents, and was prepared to receive the pills needed for the medicine-abortion. Took the pills and the next set the next day, and the pregnancy was terminated.
To be honest, I wish I had chosen the surgical abortion, because maybe it would have been fast and over with, like in the other stories I read about. Instead, I lay in bed for about two days bleeding out something that is consider beautiful. But I made my decision with all my strength.
I do not regret my decision, but I am still reminded of it every day. I live with it. Seeing women in their pregnancies, smiling and happy. Seeing newborn cousins, holding them and feeding them... In a way, that "what if" factor continues to haunt me. But I made the right decision with the support of my boyfriend and mother, and I love them both for that. No regrets, just sadness.